San Francisco Family Law Blog

A divorce can take a tremendous toll on anyone. Put simply, not only must you deal with the emotional weight of ending a marriage, but you may also face an uncertain future. If you have kids, though, you can focus on being a good parent. Unfortunately, for any number of reasons, your ex-spouse may try to sabotage the relationship you have with your kids.

Parental alienation occurs when one parent works to damage the other’s parent-child relationship. Many child psychologists consider it to be mental or emotional manipulation. Others call parental alienation a form of child abuse. Regardless, you must act quickly to stop parental alienation before it causes long-term harm to your kids. Here are three steps for doing so: 

It is likely that some people in California have heard the month of January referred to as "Divorce Month." After surviving the holidays and wanting a fresh start in the new year, many individuals initiate divorce proceedings during the month of January.

While most associate divorce with nasty fights and emotional wreckage, it seems that there also may be some financial benefits to ending a marriage. In states where couples are able to file a no-fault divorce, it seems that women are able to increase their economic power in the marriage. Statistics reveal that among couples in no-fault states, it is 8% more likely that both spouses work outside of the home full time. In the same states, it is 5% likelier for the wife to be in the labor force.

Traditional views that long upheld mothers as the only appropriate caregivers for children have left fathers with deep concerns when they pursue child custody. The court decisions made by previous generations in California frequently discounted the parenting abilities of men. Attitudes toward fathers have changed in recent years, and family law recognizes their parental rights. Fathers can and do gain full or shared custody of their children, but judges with old-fashioned beliefs still exist. To prepare for the potential of parental discrimination, fathers should gather as much evidence as possible to support their bids for child custody.

A strong case for child custody might show that the father can communicate with the mother. A judge will want to see that the parents can cooperate for the benefit of their children. Drafting a parenting plan that spells out parental duties and schedules could present evidence that the father has already invested time and energy in planning for child care. Proof that the father and children have a positive relationship might also persuade a judge to approve full or shared custody for the father.

California's community property laws require marital property to be divided equally even when divorcing spouses have only been married briefly, which is one of the reasons why premarital agreements are common in the Golden State. Prenuptial agreements allow couples to make their own decisions about how their assets will be divided should they choose to divorce, and the agreements may also include provisions that address other potentially contentious issues like spousal support.

Prenuptial agreements can be particularly useful when separate property becomes commingled during a marriage. The assets that spouses own prior to getting married are considered separate property, and some assets acquired during a marriage are not subject to division in a divorce. Gifts from third parties and inheritances are treated as separate property in a divorce. However, matters become more complicated when separate property becomes entwined with marital property.